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BUCS 2009

  Meet the teams

Oxford 1:

Oxford 2:

 

Prologue

 

BUCS is undoubtedly the biggest event in the pooling calendar for OUPC; while the Varsity match carries with it a great rivalry and sense of tradition, the nationwide championship is where we can be tested against the cream of pooling talent in further education in Britain, and for some provides the opportunity to earn themselves a trial for the national team. In the Team Championship, Oxford has failed to make it past the Quarter Final in the past, and in the singles competition our biggest achiever has been Chris Hook who made it to the last 8 in 2008. This time around, OUPC had high hopes, being seeded 7th in the Championship and with Adam Brown (seeded 12th) and Rob Gaunt (seeded 8th) hoping to cause a stir in singles. Also, for the first time, Oxford fielded a 2nd team, who went into the Team Shield with hopes of taking the competition by storm.  

Day 1: Thursday 19th February

 

A 9.30 meet in Wetherspoons for a fry-up ensured that spirits were high as the squad set off for the Theatre of Pooling Dreams in Great Yarmouth. Unsurprisingly, Lei was already sinking the pints and a sweepstake was held to guess how many he would manage over the 4 days. Adam was perhaps slightly overestimating Lei with his bid of 60, but 35-40 was seen as being well within his capabilities. More surprising, however, was Pitfield’s revelation that “last time I was in Great Yarmouth I pissed myself”.

 

   

After spending longer than was necessary in ‘spoons we boarded our laughably big minibus and set off. It was soon to become clear that Adam isn’t as good at driving as he is at pool, and Ashpole was an early casualty, being propelled into the footwell by heavy breaking. This, combined with the minibus’ permanent desire to turn left made for a treacherous journey, and we narrowly avoided a crash as Adam failed to notice a breaking lorry in front of us. Further alarm came when a sleeping Lei decided to throw his sixth beer of the day all over the floor: “I dream I in a football match in goal and ball came flying to me so I try save it”. Such events kept spirits up, as some doubters (Rob) were beginning to suggest that we wouldn’t make it in time for the tournament start. However, our plucky vehicle did us proud with its ability to hold 62mph and we arrived with time to spare, pumped up and ready to play some winning pool. All of us, that is, except John, who anticipated returning to Oxford to tell his fans that “we all lost, fell into a plateau and died”. His general grumpiness and inability to have fun (or make sense) would be a recurring theme for the duration.

Following the inevitable caravan-key mix up (despite both of the caravans having 5 beds John shotgunned the floor), we entered the arena for our first taste of the action. We weren’t to be disappointed by the splendour of the Great Yarmouth venue, which had 36 tournament standard Supreme tables, brushed and ironed between every match played on them, that made even the best tables in Oxford look awful. The preliminary round of the singles tournament kicked us off, and we didn’t start well: Hugh lost 3-0, and Nish lost 3-2 despite a break and clear (which John thought was shit). Ashpole did no better, playing like an amateur to lose 3-2 in one of the worst pool matches ever and blaming the table because it was too good. Things started to look up as Malcolm dominated his opponent and won 3-0, perhaps coming across as over-confident when he went for the hand-shake after the first frame. Pitfield won 3-1 in a match with “lots of attitude and deliberate fouls (DFs)” and John won 3-2, a result that unfortunately could not stop him moaning. Then onto the first round proper, with Harrison being the first Oxford casualty here, losing in 12 minutes and having only one chance. Pitfield and John also decided to unimpressively bow out of the tournament at this stage, losing 3-0 and 3-1 respectively, and along with the losers from the previous round agreed that “we only care about the team games anyway” as they settled into a drinking session for the evening whilst supporting their more successful teammates. One of these was Malcolm, who struggled to a 3-2 victory over someone from Cambridge, aided quite significantly by his opponent’s early potting of the black in the deciding frame. It was becoming clear that watching Malcolm would be good value for money for the rest of the tournament, because he insisted on getting himself into tactical World Rules battles every frame. Another Oxford winner was Lei, who had everyone in stitches after shouting back at the announcer who called him Liao Chang “It’s not even Lei Xiao, it’s LEI XIAO”. Despite being on his 8th pint, LEI XIAO swatted his opponent aside with a confident looking 3-1 victory.

 

 

Competitive play for the day ended at this stage, and the team settled into a low-quality practise session, the highlight being John who was playing Adam, being heard moaning loudly that “this is the worst day of my life” as he trudged dejectedly around the table in the midst of the thrashing that he no doubt expected. The evening was rounded off with a disastrous attempt to cook Apple Strudel in the oven by Hugh

Day 2: Friday 20th February

 

As to be expected, we were greeted in the morning by John moaning, this time about his hangover. We also found out that Pitfield and Lei had been involved in some drunken fighting with their first round singles opponents. The Shield began at 9.30am for the second team, the first match a toughie against Aston, seeded 2nd. Malcolm and Pitfield played textbook frames and set the match up nicely at 2-0, but unfortunately, the next 6 frames were not quite as good, and we ended up losing 6-2. Pitfield’s second frame perfectly demonstrated quite how far the momentum had shifted, when he fouled by inexplicably spazzing a dead straight red with huge amounts of screw, only to miss and for the red to bounce around the table and end up potting his opponent’s final ball. However, the team showed great character to shake off this defeat and dispatch of Reading 3 with a solid 6-3 win. John had much to moan about as he lost both of his frames.

The opener for the first team in the Championship was against Cambridge 3, and we were expecting nothing more than a comfortable win to show what we could do. Sadly things didn’t go according to the script, and we would have lost 6-3 were it not for Mark’s quick thinking as, seeing that Ashpole was about to lose, he ran around the table and slammed home a tricky black. The 6-4 defeat stung like hell, especially to Rob who had been penalised for leaving the immediate table area to put his breaking cue away after his break-off shot. Adam and Lei also had little to smile about, both losing to a girl, and Lei had hopefully played his only contender for most ridiculous shot of the tournament when he threw away a frame that had looked certain to be his by trying to be too clever and planting his opponents ball onto the black that he had put over the pocket a few shots earlier. The players were unable to dwell on this result for too long, as the singles tournament was soon to resume, and put it behind them they did with Lei winning 4-0 in an exhibition-style performance (“the guy thought I amazing, I even beat Ronnie O’Sullivan if I play like this” - surprisingly nobody saw this match to verify such outrageous claims) and Rob securing a 4-2 win after going down 2-0. Adam was confident ahead of his match against an unknown, but spectators were treated to an absolutely amazing contest, a demonstration of clearing majesty, and he breathed a huge sigh of relief after securing a 4-3 win in one of the best matches of his life. Sadly Malcolm bowed out of the tournament at this stage, losing 4-3 in what he described as “the worst game of pool ever”. He wasn’t disappointed for long however, joining the others who were no longer in singles and thus had ended their day’s pool before midday in supporting the representatives from Oxford and ensuring the bar would not go out of business anytime soon.

Next was the last 64 in singles, and here Rob would exit the tournament prematurely after playing a bit average and losing 4-2. Unfortunately he wouldn’t let any of us watch him play so we couldn’t banter him about this, but Lei made no such demands and we were lining up our tirade of abuse as he looked down and out at 0-3 to a fairly solid player from Salford. However, from nowhere he pulled some spectacular pool to get the scoreline back to 2-3. After a scrappy sixth he was preparing to shake his opponents hand, but for some reason he gave Lei another frame by hitting the black way too hard and going in-off; 3-3. At this stage Lei attempted to psych the Salford man out by offering him outside for a cigarette; his opponent will perhaps have been kicking himself for accepting as the comeback was completed upon their return, and Lei joined Adam, who had just completed a routine 4-0 win (his opponent was heard complaining “you just can’t play against this” after another amazing Brown clearance), in the last 32. Sadly, the epic encounter beforehand had taken its toll on him, and Lei lost 4-1. Again, Adam wasn’t to disappoint, winning 4-0 to set up a tricky tie with the 5th seed from York in the last 16.

As the afternoon continued Lei was on a mission to drown his sorrows, and by now we realised that our sweepstake was pointless as nobody had any idea how much he had drunk. The atmosphere was becoming a lot tenser as the business end of the singles tournament got under way, and all of our hopes rested on the shoulders of Adam who had played so well up to this point, rarely missing a pot. However, his opponent now was clearly a class player, and Adam knew he would have to take his chances when they arose. Sadly, he failed to make the decisive pots in the first two frames, and wasn’t even given a sniff in the third and fourth, and his hopes of singles glory ended here, losing 4-0. The result came as a shock to all of us, especially a hammered Lei who seemed very confused by what had happened. Perhaps at this stage we shouldn’t have let him out of our sights, as it was later brought to our attention that “your Chinese friend is absolutely battered and causing trouble at the bar”. After placating bouncers who threatened to throw Oxford out of BUCS unless he was taken away, we took Lei back to the caravan, ignoring his protests of  “but who they gonna bounce, they shit at pool”, locked him in with the lights off and hoped he wouldn’t resurface until the morning. It was later learned that he had been challenging players from Ulster (the reigning champions) to play for £1000, and it was only the bouncers who had saved him from having to go through with this.

Day 3: Saturday 21st February

 

9.30am was again the starting time for the seconds, and a 5-5 draw with Kent was an excellent result after going 1-4 down, with Pitfield even managing to perform magic tricks on the table as the comeback was completed. John had also found his form, something that only he could manage to find reason to moan about. Next they managed to beat a less than impressive Abertay team 6-3, but Pitfield’s spirit was well and truly crushed as he lost to someone who had flames and a picture of an 8-ball on his cue. However, a convincing 6-1 victory over Nottingham 3 kept the tears at bay, and set up a tricky last 16 clash with Aston, one of the favourites to take the Shield this year and whom they had lost to a day earlier in the group stage.

Meanwhile, the 1sts were continuing their shocking form following yesterday’s defeat to Cambridge 3, and saw themselves staring defeat and probable tournament exit in the face, at 0-5 to Robert Gordon University. Unable to contemplate the prospect, the team finally woke up and somehow salvaged a draw, with a little thanks to a supreme pot on the black from Gaunt at 4-5. Suddenly some decent pool was being played, and Gloucester 1sts were swatted aside in under an hour, 6-2. Next up were Durham 2, and another convincing 6-2 victory saw a complete turnaround in the group table, with Oxford coming out on top. This match also saw Ashpole earn his nickname of “Lockdown”: The scores poised at 2-2, he was sent in to play Durham’s best player, and proceeded to tie the frame up for over an hour whilst the rest of the team saw off the lesser opposition players to secure the victory. 

The final match of the day saw the Seconds take on Aston. It didn’t start well, with John finding himself on the receiving end of a break and clear, and Hugh and Malcolm found themselves being completely tied up in World Rules battles, both eventually losing. Captain Pitfield stepped up at 0-3, hoping to steady the ship that seemed to be swiftly sinking, but a miscue on the break (the cueball didn’t even touch the pack) suggested that Oxford 2 were ready to bow out of the tournament without even making a wave. However, he dug deep and took out a beautiful clearance to get Oxford’s first frame of the tie, but might as well not have bothered as Malcolm sunk a devilishly hard black…with 3 of his own balls still on the table; 1-4. Pitfield then found himself on the receiving end of a spazzed black (1-5), and the Oxford players were putting their cues away as John and Nish both had their opponents lining up blacks against them. However, inexplicably, both missed, and two beautiful clearances saw the score set at 3-5. Hugh and Nish looked set to take the match to a decider, when from nowhere Hugh’s opponent potted the black out of a snooker. This blatant fluke left a sour taste in the mouth of the whole Oxford squad for the rest of the day, which couldn’t even be removed by a trick shot exhibition from Steve Daking, “The Pro with the Show. ” Pitfield summed up the experience most aptly: “if that was his show, I’d turn over”. An early night was in order as a) tomorrow saw the deciding stages of the team championship for the 1sts, and b) the 2nds were too depressed for fun following the premature end to their campaign.

 

Day 4: Sunday 22nd February

 

A good night’s sleep saw Oxford come out of the blocks with all guns blazing in their 9.30am clash with Reading, and a display of pooling brilliance (with a little more locking down from Ashpole) delivered the fine result of 6-0. There was an audible air of excitement as the Quarter Final ties were announced: Oxford vs Cambridge. Furthermore, the match was to be played on the TV tables, which were being filmed for Cue Sport TV. Adam and Rob got proceedings underway for Oxford, playing solidly and getting us off to a nice 2-0 lead. However, some bad luck saw the scoreline swing the other way, and suddenly Lei found himself having to dig deep after missing a break and clear to grind out a victory to get the scores level: 3-3. More awesome play from Adam and Rob, and we were only one frame away from victory at 5-3. Malcolm, who had been roped in to doing commentary for Cue Sport TV was clearly excited all too ready to proclaim the greatness of the Oxford team, much to the annoyance of his Cambridge counterpart who seemed determined to get the word “cannon” into every sentence. Harrison found himself on the receiving end of a break and clear, and at 5-4 Ashpole was at the table needing a win to put Oxford into the semi and avoid a playoff. This was perhaps not the best time to forget world rules, but forget he did, and his opponent, ex-Oxford student Dunstan Barnes, was all too happy to call the foul after he failed to nominate which colour he was going for after potting off the break. Ooops. Pitfield, who had been busy providing the Oxford team with countless pints of water, got himself a stern ticking off from the TV director for swearing loudly at this point. Barnes went for a clearance that seemed not to be on to everybody watching (by now there was quite a crowd), but somehow got down to the black, only to miss and leave Ashpole with a tricky 8-ball clearance that he duly dispatched, despite his every instinct crying out for him to try to lock the frame down. What a turn around from the first match of the qualifying stage, losing 6-4 to Cambridge 3!

Celebrations were short-lived, as the semi-final with Queens Belfast was immediately underway. Lei didn’t even get a pint in, instead settling for a celebratory water, which Pitfield duly provided. Rob and Adam opened again for Oxford, and although he lost the lag, Adam won in less time than it took Rob to play 2 shots, swiftly clearing off of his opponents break. They were to be Rob’s only 2 shots of the frame, as his opponent took out an awesome clearance to level the score at 1-1. Swift losses from Lei and Ashpole put Oxford in a tight spot, but Harrison refused to lose in a frame that he really should have to bring the score back to 2-3. Adam and Rob, who, since the opening defeat to Cambridge 3 had played out of their skin for the team, saw off their next opponents with few problems to put Oxford in front at 4-3. Lei and Ashpole then took the to the tables, knowing that 2 victories would put the team into the final for the first time since (our) records began (2007). However, more twists were to come, with Lei unexpectedly choking on a simple 3-ball clearance to allow Queens to bring the score back to level. Unfortunately Ashpole found himself well and truly screwed in his frame, and suddenly Harrison was in the unenviable position of having to win to keep Oxford in the tournament. Thankfully Pitfield was on hand with more water to keep him calm, and he pulled out the clearance of his life (which even John, who hadn’t complemented anyone all weekend, said was “a bit alright”) to take the match into a 3 frame playoff.

 

AT THIS POINT OXFORD LOSE IN SUCH DISGUSTING CIRCUMSTANCES THAT I REFUSE TO WRITE ABOUT IT, OTHER THAN TO MENTION THAT IT WAS ALL PITFIELD’S FAULT FOR GIVING US (HARRISON IN PARTICULAR), SO MUCH WATER.

 

Conclusion

 

So, Oxford 1 bowed out in the semi-final, receiving a bronze medal for all their hard work, and Oxford 2 made it to the knock out stages of the shield competition in their first ever year in the tournament. Overall, and despite basically losing the semi final due to a technicality, Captain Rob Gaunt said he was “very happy and proud of everyone”. This was the best Oxford had done for a long time, and although there was a real sense that we could win the team championship, had we been offered getting to the semi final on arrival we’d have taken it and left! Perhaps the only disappointment was that nobody really excelled in singles: Adam made it to the last 16, but everyone thought he had the quality to go much further, proof of this being in his subsequent call up to the England students team. John summed the general attitude up with an uncharacteristically positive comment as we finished our celebratory team meal in Little Chef and embarked upon the long journey back to Oxford: “I think we did a bit better than shit and that’s alright”.